Damned if I do, damned if I don't

So I haven't updated in a while, and today's post is going to be about my health.

This past June, I had a tonsillectomy. The reason I had my tonsils removed is because for the past three years I have been visiting a slew of doctors (okay not a slew, but I talked about this situation with my regular doctor, a sleep doctor and an ENT) about my snoring problem. The two main causes of snoring is one excessive weight, and two, tonsils. Particularly large tonsils cause an issue, which I have. I had a small mouth and not huge but large enough tonsils to cause an issue.

I have both problems, and since weight is a a fluctuate thing with me, tonsils would be somewhat of a permanent solution, in a way. Since the surgery (a rather painful surgery, which I also lost my voice to as well for a few weeks. My voice was as high pitched as a four year old girl. Talking was not fun.) I have been doing better. I don't snore except when I'm sick. (After my experience, when I have kids, they are getting their tonsils out as soon as they are old enough. They will not go through the pain their mommy had to endure at 23 years old.)

However, it has apparently reeked havoc on some other health issues. I had a dentist appointment yesterday, which I already knew they were going to tell me to do a better job on flossing. Flossing is rather difficult because of the small mouth issue, and I know I can't get in there like I should. I also don't feel like shelling out money on expensive toothbrushes and floss picks. But flossing wasn't their main concern. Although it is partly the reason why now I have nine cavities that need to be filled, apparently my tonsillectomy has reeked havoc on my mouth.

I noticed after my tonsillectomy that my mouth is drier than ever. Every time I do some form of exercise or go up the stairs, I start dry hacking really bad. The reason being that my tonsils being removed has now caused an issue of forming saliva; apparently my mouth doesn't make enough. So while my sleeping issue may be somewhat solved, I now caused a problem with my teeth. If you don't produce enough saliva, apparently it causes cavities. So now I am screwed. I now have to make another appointment with my ENT to discuss solutions. Now I have to buy special toothpaste and mouth wash, along with some gel crap to use on my mouth for my dry mouth issues. I can't win.

I realized a few weeks ago that every vacation I took from work in 2009 I had surgery. I had surgery with some other minor issues in March, in June I had a tonsillectomy, and in December I had minor foot surgery. In which I am still healing from the foot surgery. My doctor told me it may take up to a year to completely heal. How lovely.

He didn't want me to go to the gym for another 2 to 3 weeks, but I went last night anyways. Today I got yelled at by the millionth time to lose weight. Well no shit sherlock.

I just walked on the indoor track. What I really want to do is swim, but that definitely has to wait at least two more weeks because of the wound. I also want to do my regular routine of treadmill, elliptical and weights. I could do some weights, but the gym was overly crowded last night. I have to wear these sponge things on my toe for a while until it heals more.

The reason I had foot surgery is because for years, I had this ugly mole in between my toes. It never bothered me except the looks of it. Well, I went to a dermatologist (who I didn't like and I am now in the process of looking for a new one), but what we both agreed was that it needed to come out. Of course, the damn fool wanted it to come out that day. I had to wait a few more weeks to get a doctor that I wanted to take it out, to take it out. Which led to time off from work and lots of wound care. Thankfully it wasn't cancerous, but still.

I love doctors. They think that they can just tell you to do certain things, take some pills and cut certain crap out and that's it you're better. I have no problem wanting to lose weight and taking care of things. However, my life is not conducive to just snapping the fingers and making it happen.

My beef with these doctors is never ending. All of them tell me to lose weight. Well duh, do you think I like looking myself in the mirror? However see, even though I am well educated (I do have a BA), there are no jobs out there. I work a job that requires me to stand on my feet anywhere from 4 to 6 or more hours at a time. By the time I'm done, even with a 15 minute break that does nothing for me, my feet are killing me. They give you a crappy mat to stand on a cement floor and do repetitive crap for that amount of time. I go home to sit down while pain shoots up my legs and my back kills from the slight bend I have to make to count change. Also, the awkward lifting of turkeys and dog food from one side to another in a small contained space.

When I do have days off, I am too tired to function properly for a real workout. I don't want to rely on pain reliever, because some of my family members can no longer take certain pain medications because they took too much. If I were to take pain reliever every time I had pain from work so I can hit the gym, I would be a medical mess. Ideally at this point of my life, I was hoping to have a real job, where I would ideally spend time in an office sitting so I can actually enjoy getting up and doing some serious workouts. But currently my life is not working out to it's ideal potential.

Weight loss also has to deal with food too, which I know all too well. However, it is expensive to eat healthy, so I mix it up. I eat healthy when I can afford to eat healthier. I also don't have a schedule where I can plan the six small meals a day either. Which is why I end up eating late at night and sporadic times of the day, not making the weight loss any easier.

It's not that I don't hit the gym or eat healthy,but the way I'm currently doing things only maintains, not helps lose weight efficiently. I need a jump start, but in order to get a real jump start, I need a real job that a.) pays well, b.) requires a mix of sitting and standing or just not standing the whole time c.) really good health insurance and d.) a somewhat regular schedule so I can plan regular gym time or workouts or just getting up and about.

I also loved how my derm thought I could just get my toe surgery done that day. Hello, I don't have a desk job, I have a STANDING job. I needed time off, and it was before Christmas, and I work retail. Not exactly a thing to "just do". Thank God I am in an union, because if I were anywhere else, I could be fired for "taking time off" for a surgery because I "wasn't meeting the needs of the company". In retail, all bodies are needed during the Holidays. I need to get paid, as this is my only source of income. I had one last vacation, but if I needed more time off, I wouldn't get paid, and how the hell am I supposed to pay my bills? These doctors don't think sometimes. This is the crap I get for trying to take care of myself.

I will post a blog entry soon on my issues with the healthcare bill.